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Thursday, December 17, 2009

Union Jack News


Sir Hook's Traveling Medicine Show is back in Columbus, Ohio. I dropped into one of my favorite watering holes...The Pub in Polaris this evening and came across a recent edition of the "Union Jack", America's only national British newspaper.

My fellow patrons wondered if I had just escaped from a mental institution as I laughed my "arse" off while reading the news from the Merry Isles! Here's just a few "Quintessential English" headlines:

Royal Navy Ship Watched As Pirates Took Two Britons

Jenny Earns Titled As 'Loudest Snorer' in Britain

Rare Charles Darwin Book Found on Toilet Bookshelf in Oxford Home

Movie Actors Thought to be Real Football Thugs

Allergy Turns Out to be Man's Own Wife

Baby Back Home with 'Fat Family'

Brits Said to be Ugliest in the World

Margaret's Vacuum Given a Spot in Hall of Hoover History

Britain Has World's Oldest Divorcees , 98

Some Kids Really Think Hitler Was a Football Manager



And my favorite of the bunch reminded me of our fun this past July in London while "Getting Off at Shepherd's Bush"!

TUBE RIDERS SHOCKED BY 'PASSIONATE TANNOY MESSAGE'
LONDON: Underground commuters got a shock last month when instead of train information being broadcast on the tannoy system, they got an earful of a couple apparently making love.
Passengers at West Ham station in east London heard sounds of passion instead of the usual announcements about delays being relayed over platform loudspeakers during the rush hour.
A Transport for London spoksman blamed radio interference-but passengers were not convinced. "It was definitely a couple doing it there and then.", Laura O'Conner told the London Evening Standard newspaper.
"He was grunting loudly and she sounded like she was having a great time. The driver must have heard it, too, as the doors stayed open longer than usual."
However, the Transport for London spoksman insisted: "The noises heard by passengers were not from within our station. We believe they were a result of some sort of interference with our public address system. It certainly wasn't coming from our staff."
He said the station's public address system worked on radio waves and somebody must have been broadcasting on the same wavelength. He said staff turned off the loudspeakers as soon as they realized what was going on.

My only question is....was Sir Dayvd of Oxfordshire around West Ham station last month? Sir Bowie and I remember all too well how he left us at the platform with our ladies in tow on the Central Line!

Sir Hook Who Loves a good English Story of Warrick




Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Life is a Gift...Live It!


1. Throw out nonessential numbers. This includes age, weight and height.

2.
Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you down.

3.
Keep learning. Learn more about the computer, crafts, gardening, whatever. Never let the brain idle. 'An idle mind is the devil's workshop.'

4.
Enjoy the simple things.

5.
Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath.

6.
The tears happen. Endure, grieve, and move on. The only person, who is with us our entire life, is ourselves. Be ALIVE while you are alive.

7.
Surround yourself with what you love , whether it's family, pets, keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies, whatever. Your home is your refuge.

8.
Cherish your health: If it is good, preserve it. If it is unstable, improve it. If it is beyond what you can improve, accept it.

9.
Don't take guilt trips. Take a trip to the mall, even to the next county; to a foreign country but NOT to where the guilt is.

10.
Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity.

AND ALWAYS REMEMBER:
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take,
but by the moments that take our breath away.

P.S. Pass it On!

Sir Hook the Guru of Warrick


Tuesday, December 15, 2009

The Art of Tea Pot Blowing


So you are a Brit and you love your national drink, and at Tea Time you stand around waiting for the kettle to boil... what do you do with the spare three or four minutes that this takes?. What you do is revive the Lost Art of Tea-Pot Blowing. You fill the pot full of liquid, press your mouth and cheeks firmly over the lidless hole in the top, creating a vacuum seal, and blow.


You can start off by using the sink as a target, but the real proud moment for the confident Tea Pot Blower is to direct it into your best china without getting any on your fine wooden dining table.

You can't say we are not easily amused here on this island. and the Youtube is becoming full of examples of the world joining in.






Just remember, If you try this at home (and I know you all are going to).

Hot Tea is Hot.

Sir Dayvd ( the Potty ) of Oxfordshire