Coo Coo Cachoo Mrs. Robinson

Seeing how we have now migrated to the subject of Bar Flies, I thought it appropriate to share a story, insight, depraved vision, etc. from my journal several weeks ago while doing observations at Fado Pub in Columbus, Ohio.

As I was writing in my journal I was across the bar from two guys and a girl doing the "ritual mating dance" that we humans do so terribly. It became surreal when the music system started to blare out Simon and Garfunkel's, "Mrs. Robinson". As some of you know, but not the 20 something subjects of my depraved study, it is the theme song to the movie "The Graduate", where Dustin Hoffman's character learns all about sex from Mrs. Robinson, played by Ann Bancroft, real time wife to Mel Brooks. So without further ado, I give you my version of Mrs. Robinson:

Mrs. Robinson plays on the juke box...
while bar flies play tag.
Who is it tonight?
Who is right tonight?
What is right tonight?
Heaven is for those who wait...
or so the song says.
Or, as another song says...
the waiting is the hardest part.
That's why very few get it right.
Can they wait?
It's too late...
as they mentally masturbate...
while I pontificate on a society...
that defecates on itself...
while they wait for Mrs. Robinson.

Sir Hook of Johnson & Johnson Labs of Warrick