Message in a Bottle

I spent a lot of my money on booze, birds, and fast cars. The rest I just squandered.
George Best

Give me a woman who loves beer and I will conquer the world.
Kaiser Wilhelm

Then trust me, there's nothing like drinking. So pleasant this side of the grave; it keeps the unhappy from thinking and makes even the valiant more brave.
Charles Didbin

Put it back in the horse!
(after he drank his first American beer) H. Allen Smith, an American humorist in the 30's - 50's
Here's a toast to the roast that good fellowship lends, with the sparkle of beer and wine; May its sentiment always be deeper, my friends, than the foam at the top of the stein. Then here's to the heartening wassail, wherever good fellows are found; Be its master instead of its vassal, and order the glasses around.
Ogden Nash

Sometimes when I reflect back on all the beer I drank, I feel ashamed. Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the brewery and all of their hopes and dreams. If I didn't drink this beer, they might be out of work and their dreams would be shattered. Then I say to myself, "It is better that I drink this beer and let their dreams come true than be selfish and worry about my liver.
Jack Handy

When the hour is nigh,
Let me in a tavern die,
With a tankard by me.
Archpoet "Confesio", 12th century

Why is it that when you drink seven nights a week in college you are a partier, and after that you are an alcoholic?

Beer brewers shall sell no beer to the citizens, unless it be three weeks old; to the foreigner they may knowingly sell younger beer.
German beer law, 1466

If the hangover preceded the binge, alcoholism would be considered a virtue and not a vice.
Gregory Bateson

For we could not now take time for further search (to land our ship) our victuals being much spent, especially our Beer.
Ship's log of the Mayflower

But the greatest love--the love above all loves, even greater than that of a mother... Is the tender, passionate, undying love, of one beer drunken slob for another.
Irish love ballad

If I had to live my life over, I'd live over a saloon.
W.C. Fields

It is a fair wind that blew men to the ale.
Washington Irving

Beer has long been the prime lubricant in our social intercourse and the sacred throat-anointing fluid that accompanies the ritual of mateship. To sink a few cold ones with the blokes is both an escape and a confirmation of belonging.
Rennie Ellis

What event is more awfully important to an English colony than the erection of its first brew house?
Reverend Sidney Smith

The hard part about being a bartender is figuring out who is drunk and who is just stupid.
Richard Braunstein

This is one of the disadvantages of wine; it makes a man mistake words for thoughts.
Samuel Johnson

I wish to see this beverage become common instead of the whiskey which kills one-third of our citizens and ruins their families.
Thomas Jefferson January 6, 1816 on beer

Q. Why is American beer served cold?
A. So you can tell it from urine.
David Moulton

You sit back in the darkness, nursing your beer, breathing in that ineffable aroma of the old-time saloon: dark wood, spilled beer, good cigars, and ancient whiskey - the sacred incense of the drinking man.
Bruce Aidells

People Like You...
Are the reason people like me drink.

Draft beer, not people!
Anti-War Protest


Sir Dayvd of Oxford-shire.