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Friday, March 21, 2008


Now, today being Good Friday and all one might expect me to pontificate about the events of that day and how it has changed the world and changed me. I'll give you, there were a few JERKS involved in the events of that fateful Friday...however....

not the JERK I'm talking about. Steve Martin made the movie JERK into a brilliant career in comedy. Besides, the headline on this movie poster could be used in today's political environment. "All I want is this black limousine, this oval office, and secret stuff nobody else will know about. That's all I want." Sorry...JERK!

Now, there's the Clean & Jerk for our Free Weight Wheeling Friends. Dare say that this picture of the beginning of this storied move might lend itself better to what happens in the locker room afterwards...the Jerk & Clean.

Regardless, this is still not the JERK we seek. Albeit, it is getting closer to two key ingredients: 1) HOT 2) SPICY

No, the JERK we're talking about is a seasoning of spices made famous in Jamaica and found throughout the Caribbean Islands. Jerk Pork, Jerk Chicken, Jerk Beef and my favorite American recipe...Jerk Fries! While stopping in for a couple of rounds of my favorite Ales at Old Chicago last night, I decided to indulge in a basket of Jerk Fries while watching the NCAA. Last night's were particularly coated and VERY SPICY! OK, Now you're asking, besides the obvious what are you getting at? Well, I felt it necessary to share this bit of wisdom with my fellow Knights. After eating my fries in a drunken frenzy, I proceeded to the bathroom to relieve myself. What I'm getting at is this. MAKE SURE YOU WASH YOUR HANDS AFTER EATING JERK FRIES AND BEFORE YOU HANDLE YOUR MANHOOD OVER A PORCELAIN TOILET ON PAIN OF BECOMING THE BIGGEST JERK PORK LOIN YOU'LL EVER SEE!!!!
There, now I feel better and have finally cooled off.

Sir Hook the Spicy Jerk of Warrick


  1. Sir Hook, now I know why I'd love you even if you were the color of a baboon's ass.

    I, too, was born a poor black man -- though I was never rich enough to won a thermos, I do have my friends.

    Hook, I'm crying because of laughing so hard at your Jerked Pork experience. That, and I just heard a song on the radio that reminded me of the way we were.

    What was it?
    "The Way We Were."

    I'll see you in a couple of weeks after spring break. Keep those hands clean and those thoughts...

    Sir Bowie "page 199 of the User-Friendly Phone Book" of Greenbriar

  2. This is disappointing, Sir Hook. I don't get it. On the day we commemorate today the Lord Jesus bravely gave his life for me, for you and for all. This is an occasion which calls for solemnity, no?

    A knight knows when and how to joke, laugh and celebrate, surely, but also when to quietly reflect and refrain from undue levity. This is such a day.

    - Sir Richard of Montreal